Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
