try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
