well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
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You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
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I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize