I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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