@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
