he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
