apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
