Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
