Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
