It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
barbara walters just said penis...
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
