i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
