Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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