Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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