And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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