Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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