the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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