It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
this will be a night to untag.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
