The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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