The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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