Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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