honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
false alarm. still invincible.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
