I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
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You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
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His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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