I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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