i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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