I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
