They have a pepper shaker for pot.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Green mimosas i think yes
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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