Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  What a fucking waste of an outfit

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  (415): What a fucking waste of an outfit http://tfl.nu/q0u1
  Replies (8) Good night (483) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  therell be strippers and coke right?

  (703): View more from Virginia

  no strippers. just coke.

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i hate this fuckin recession

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  (202): therell be strippers and coke right? (703): no strippers. just coke. (202): i hate this fuckin recession http://tfl.nu/1tv9
  Replies (22) Good night (10806) Bad night (2627)
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  (650): View more from California

  I feel great

  (650): View more from California

  I just peed on a car

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  (650): I feel great (650): I just peed on a car http://tfl.nu/eq9k
  Replies (8) Good night (2870) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles

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  (612): I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles http://tfl.nu/ysmu
  Replies (19) Good night (1292) Bad night (4996)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar

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  (732): i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar http://tfl.nu/z6xf
  Replies (9) Good night (3264) Bad night (817)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think

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  (304): Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think http://tfl.nu/bm7u
  Replies (16) Good night (603) Bad night (4128)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.

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  (708): She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin. http://tfl.nu/wbej
  Replies (24) Good night (1819) Bad night (6728)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair

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  (603): Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair http://tfl.nu/7ypz
  Replies (36) Good night (4614) Bad night (1319)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  cat food counts as protein by the way

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  (709): cat food counts as protein by the way http://tfl.nu/k5gc
  Replies (13) Good night (1556) Bad night (4121)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.

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  (727): I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due. http://tfl.nu/nv78
  Replies (26) Good night (7011) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.

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  (919): I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face. http://tfl.nu/zz9g
  Replies (9) Good night (1988) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.

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  (510): It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him. http://tfl.nu/gszx
  Replies (4) Good night (3024) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.

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  (214): Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming. http://tfl.nu/yp4i
  Replies (21) Good night (1431) Bad night (1332)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?

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  (404): When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012? http://tfl.nu/cat9
  Replies (12) Good night (1655) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.

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  (202): 90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here. http://tfl.nu/6qce
  Replies (1) Good night (170) Bad night (459)

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