just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously