And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
