six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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