After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
