I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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