You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
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