i just google imaged poop.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize