theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
