But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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