A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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