is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
