i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
