so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Terrible idea I love it
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
