ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
