I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
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Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
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She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog