people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
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There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
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OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
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