So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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