The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
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You took a bar mat shot.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
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I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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