Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
you win again, gameday.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
