just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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