Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
