Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
