Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
