Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
