Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
